The influencer

When I first started this social media thing  I was just posting selfies like all the other girls for fun and personal jumps in my self esteem. I did not expect it to grow into a business opportunities or that it could even be considered a real career. When people think of "influencers" they picture 17 to 24 year old girls with perfect bodies sticking out their lips and posing just right for their butt to look big. The media has exposed many influencers as spoiled brats with clout asking businesses for money and free merchandise and then not even completing or committing to the work required. OOOH...? I bet you probably assumed there is no work involved in just looking pretty in front of a camera! Well if you assumed that you would be wrong. There is a whole lot more to it when contracts are involved and that's not even the worst of it.... Staying relevantly marketable means you have to constantly grow your audience and stay current to be considered valuable by brands or social media careers. If you do not throughly understand how your social media platform works in detail down to each update staying current and growing is pretty much impossible. Expecially since social media sites have learned that they can make a profit by charging you to advertise to your own followers. Unfortunately influencer is a stigmatized career because those in the forefront of the business are usually still under 25 years of age and in most cases not educated in brand marketing and advertising. Many of them just want to have fun and look good in front of their peers and they do not take it seriously at all. They approach small businesses for free merchandise without professionally finding out if the business even has a budget for advertisment. They sign on with too many brands and don't meet deadlines or they never meet photo advertising requirements. It's the way it is because it's still a fairly new option in advertising and predominantly is made up of younger people with huge amounts of followers that did not plan to turn their platforms into a business in the first place. In the beginning brands chose social media influencer because it's cheaper than paying a whole team of photographers, models, hairstylist and for a shoot venue. It saved them lots of money and the naiveté of influencer was a plus as well because most of them do not know what they are worth to brands and are usually under paid. It's a crazy industry on both sides of the coin I assure you...  However, the influencer isn't going anywhere anytime soon because  it has become the necessity for advertising because social media has the most influential impact on society.

    So then there's me yall...

   I'm going to be 38 this November.  I'm a fat black girl and a mother of 2. I'm only 5'2 which is pretty much unheard of in plus size modeling who are always tall. That doesn't sound like an influencer at all does it?  I don't even have a big butt but I'm an influencer! Luckily every kind of subculture you can imagine there is an influencer for it because big business wants to reach everyone and everyone these days and in the future will be on social media.

I generally like what I do for the most part because I'm an artist at heart and I enjoy building a mood for other people to feel. I like nature and beautiful things and I absolutely adore costuming. Instagram gave me a place to showcase my creativity and tell my stories. I didn't expect it to be therapeutic both mentally and emotionally.  I didn't expect it to grow me as a person as much as it has either. In many ways becoming an influencer has positively affected my life and I am grateful for the experience. I have discovered that I can do great things with and for myself I had never believed in the past I have true potential for.  I have met many people who get me with the same interests and thoughts and feelings as I, after feeling like an outcast majority of my life. It has mostly been good to me but there is a dark side as well. 

      The worst dark side for me is stalkers. I have been sexually assaulted in my past long before I became an influencer. I had a gun pushed into my back before by a man I didn't even know at my job as a front desk attendant at a hotel and I have dealt with crazy men my whole life. So naturally I am not comfortable with being stalked because I know first hand it can be seriously dangerous. Sometimes I don't feel safe and the higher I climb in this career the more terrifying it becomes. It's the reason I don't post photos of my children anymore on my page and the reason I avoid large crowds and being noticed in public. I receive loads of messages everyday from people that can start off nice with compliments and support but the moment they aren't getting the attention they want from you or you tell them they have gone too far and have to set boundaries they become abusive and threatening and will troll you and try to hurt your career. I have had to learn the valuable lessons that friends and fans are not the same thing. Fans don't see you as your true yourself. They see you as a fantasy and they impose unreasonable expectations on you from their delusions. They began to think that just because they have read all your blogs and saw all your photos that they actually know you and understand you better than you know and understand yourself. They start to believe that just because they complimented you that you owe them something in return and will try and guilt trip and manipulate you to get what they want. Admiration and attention is not all that it's cracked up to be under the surface. Admiration can turn sour on a dime and calling attention to yourself always brings alot of negative attention with it. I have always known that but it's a whole other thing to experience first hand. 

   There's other things that suck too like people pretending to be brands trying to scam you. People stealing my photos of my husband and I to advertise dating sites or putting your photos on porn hubs. I've had people try and steal my whole identity and make a new page with my photos and catfish people.... smh... that was by far the funniest. 

    For those of you that think you may want to try this influencer thing I encourage you to go for it but please invest in marketing knowledge and research so you don't get used by brands or scams out there. For your safety never take photos of where you live, or your car with your plates showing. Don't post your location until after you leave that location. Don't take any brand deals that want you to buy something from them first. 

Being an influencer is and can be a dream job. You get invited to places often and sometimes companies will reach out to you for influencer trips to exotic locations. You get a ton of free stuff as well but don't get hooked on that if you want a pay check. It's great for those who has a creative talent of any kind to showcase to the world and it can take you far if you stay on top of educating yourself and learn as many avenues as possible so that one day you can transition out. Because like most advertising and entertainment careers it's extremely demanding work to have to constantly  put yourself out there in the limelight every single day. As you cultivate your audience learn to dream bigger and come up with things completely independent from someone else's brand and make your own. Start an online business, write a book or use all those social media marketing management skills you have learned and run someone else's social media business. There are tons of opportunities out there for influencers that doesn't require you to ever post your face in public.